Online Dating Humor: In The Stars


 

By Lucas Owen

 

Paul has had a few dates with Anna, a wonderful woman that he met on an online dating site. Anna is a big fan of a pop band and wants Paul to come along with a friend of hers to see her favorite band live in concert. Paul agrees, although he is not a big fan of the genre. He picks both Anna and Debbie up at Anna’s house. On the car ride to the concert, Debbie, whom Paul has never met is very talkative.

“So what’s your sign, Paul?” Debbie asks. She is sitting in the back seat.

“Gemini,” Paul replies.

“Oooh, that’s a good one. Did you know that Gemini males are very kind and friendly? They are also very good around people and can be very witty.”

“I think that would describe me,” Paul replies happily.

Anna is beaming at Paul from ear to ear, clearly happy with what Debbie has just said.

“Debbie is a professional astrologer. She is amazing and is always right. I always take what she says as gospel. In the ten years that we have known each other, she has always been right. I just don’t know how she does it,” Anna says.

“Yes, Gemini males are truly fun to be around,” Debbie continues, “and they make everyone around them feel special. However, from my studies, I have found that they also have about four different personalities.”

Debbie continues, “One day, they can be the most romantic guy in the world and the next, they can be cancelling a date without notice. They can propose marriage to you one day and the next, leave you standing at the altar humiliated. They can treat you like a queen one day and the next, forget your name entirely. In fact, due to the multiple personalities that they have, they can literally be a different person every day. Can you imagine waking up with a person like that? How bizarre.”

Debbie starts humming to herself.

After a few seconds, Anna says, “Paul, please drop us off at the nearest exit.”

 

 

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