Rather, bad luck.
People you have been meeting on dating apps should come with a disclaimer that reads, “There’s a catch.”
You do everything you can to verify that they are legitimate.
You study their photos with a fine tooth comb to decipher how dated they are or whether they belong to someone else.
Once you have their last name, you do a google search to verify whether they have a criminal record.
In conversations you have with them, you have asked the right questions to get a read on whether they are as intelligent as they made themselves out to be on their dating profile, being that they stated that they have a degree in higher education.
On dates, you observe their social etiquette, watching for bad manners.
Everything you do is done to keep yourself from another disappointment.
You don’t want to invest the effort on someone who ends up being a complete waste of said effort.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, you find out that they are too self-obsessed, bigoted, not over an ex or they want kids immediately.
This has been your fate in online dating.
Meeting people who appeared to be fine on the surface, to learn that there was a catch all along.
It’s that much worse when it’s someone that you were really connecting with.
The conversations were dynamic.
The dates were superb.
The chemistry was palpable.
Then they tell you that they have received a job offer and are moving across the country to accept it.
This is getting out of hand.
Why is there always a catch when it comes to online dating?
To meet someone with all their ducks in a row, from their physical to emotional attractiveness, values and morals, and availability to date, seems impossible.
Is this too much to ask for?
There is someone who meets what you are looking for on dating sites and no, they don’t come with the disclaimer, “There is a catch.”
Online dating is a numbers game.
Those who have had success in online dating meet an average of at least 10 people before landing a long-term relationship with the right match.
How many people have you met?
Online dating isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon.
Knowing who you want to attract and their qualities is good, but you must afford yourself the runway to meet this special person.
Those who care less about who they attract, land a partner quicker.
You have higher standards.
This means that you won’t land a partner as quickly.
Consider whether these people you have met were left disappointed too.
Did you come with a catch too?
It’s unnerving to study ourselves and where we are coming up short.
With high standards in what you want in a mate, meeting those high standards yourself gives you a much better shot at getting said mate.
Do you embody who you want to attract?
Do you meet those high standards too?
Are you as physically and emotionally attractive as you deem yourself to be?
Do you have skeletons in your closet?
As you work on meeting someone that checks off the boxes in what you want in a mate, never lose sight of what you bring to the table.
Where there is a discrepancy, your plight may not change.