Someone’s past is relevant, but it isn’t always the end all be all.
People have a forgiving nature in respect to the past behavior of a potential partner, so long as the person isn’t an axe murderer.
Drugs are a pervasive problem in society.
It is not out of the ordinary to discover that every one in some capacity has been affected or has some experience with a friend, family member, work colleague, etc., who was afflicted by drugs.
In this vain, it isn’t that unusual for people not to look at meeting someone on a dating app who has done drugs as a deal-breaker.
The real issue lies in whether the person is actively using drugs and is an addict.
This is where it becomes a deal-breaker with people on dating apps.
It’s not that they don’t empathize with the person.
It’s the fear that entertaining such a person would lead to a steep drop in the quality of life they lead.
Just like them, you didn’t sign up on a dating app to save someone.
You signed up to find a long-term partner to share your life with.
You know that no one is perfect, which leaves you open to forgiving a person’s past, to an extent, along with some of their current idiosyncrasies.
A person with an ongoing drug addiction is a different story.
This is where many people on dating sites would have a deal-breaker.
And it is also where you should too.
You might be talking to someone right now on a dating app that you suspect has done drugs and may still be doing it.
You didn’t know this at first.
But, after having a good number of conversations with him, he informed you about it.
You are at a crossroads on what to do, being that you have genuinely enjoyed the conversations you have been having with him.
The idea of dating a guy who is actively using drugs is worrisome to you, but you aren’t certain on whether he is still using.
That’s where you dig.
Dig for information.
The mission is to learn whether he is still actively using drugs, and if so, what kind?
Lots of people smoke weed for recreation and it has no adverse effects in the how they go about living.
They go to work, take care of their families and pay their taxes.
They are contributing, law-abiding citizens.
That’s one thing.
Perhaps a guy who is only smoking weed for recreation wouldn’t be enough to be a deal-breaker for you.
But a guy who is doing hard addictive drugs like cocaine or heroine is on another level.
This introduces complicated drama into your life.
If indeed he is still doing drugs, you need to determine whether he is doing hard or addictive drugs.
Don’t just take his word for it.
Do an internet search on him through various search engines like google, etc.
A guy who has done hard drugs and persisting in doing it would most likely have an arrest history.
Seeing a recent arrest for drug use lets you know that he is actively doing drugs.
Although you are someone who can empathize with those doing drugs, especially those who grew up in abusive homes, it isn’t worth it to get yourself involved.
No matter what he tells you about working on recovering from it, a recent drug arrest means that this is an ongoing issue, and this shouldn’t be your fight.