Online Dating: Ignoring People’s Deal Breakers?

Online Dating: Ignoring People's Deal Breakers?

Too often, you match with a guy, thinking that he has read your deal breakers, only to find out that he never did, or simply chose to ignore them.

Major deal breakers such as not wanting to date cigarette smokers or people with kids, are routinely ignored by the men you match with on dating apps.

It leaves you feeling bad whenever you hit it off with a match and have to break it off with him when you learn a while later that he chose to ignore a deal breaker that you clearly listed in your dating profile.

You don’t believe it’s your fault.

These men are ignoring your deal breakers, which sends the message that they could care less about what matters to you.

If anything, he should be doing his due diligence to read through your dating profile to make sure that he meets what you are looking for in a match.

Why are deal breakers ignored on dating apps?

Unfortunately, some guys on dating apps have a notion that once you get to talk to them, and see how amazing they are, you are letting go of your deal breakers.

Yes, there is a lot of ego involved with this notion.

He believes that his dazzling personality, charm, and lifestyle, is enough to make you rethink your deal breakers and give him a shot.

The idea that he can change your mind once you get to know him and everything he has to offer is prevalent in his mind.

He doesn’t want to accept the reality that for lots of people, deal breakers are deal breakers for a reason.

Some deal breakers are absolutely ironclad no matter how good an interaction with a match is going.

For you, your deal breakers are ironclad too.

Some of the most popular deal breakers on dating apps have to do with not wanting to date smokers, people with kids, people who are married, and people with a criminal record.

Your deal breakers are nonnegotiable.

Alas, he thinks differently.

For some of these guys, a deal breaker isn’t a reason to avoid swiping right on your dating profile when he believes he is in the process of getting rid of said deal breaker in his own life.

For instance, a deal breaker where you don’t want to date a smoker.

A guy who has been working on quitting the habit, and believes he is on the precipice of achieving this goal, thinks he is justified in ignoring your deal breaker.

As far as he is concerned, he is about to succeed in his battle to quit smoking, so there is no need to avoid swiping right on your dating profile.

The same applies to a deal breaker where you don’t want to date someone who is already married.

A guy that is separated from his wife or in the process of working on getting a divorce, believes he can ignore that deal breaker.

He surmises that although he doesn’t know when exactly a divorce is happening, it is on the horizon, which means that he can ignore your deal breaker and swipe right on your dating profile.