Codependency Relationship

[Maria Nguyen]

Hi there!

I was with what I thought the love of my life for almost 2 years. He was a striper and he quit striping for me.

Ever since he quit his job, he’d spend every day with me. We’d always do fun things and lots of sex (I lost my virginity to him).

At first I wanted my own space. But because he didn’t really have any good friends and he insisted I was the girl of his dream, he kept spending everyday with me. To the point where he wouldn’t even listen to me when I said I didnt wanna see him. He’d show up to my house unannounced. Eventually, I enjoyed spending time with him so much, I just gave in.

I let him infect himself in every part of my life and I enjoyed it. He picked me up from the gym everyday. He drove me to school. We ate together. We slept together every night. We watched movies, we went out,… we were inseparable. To the point where the relationship got violent, the cops got involved and we still could not leave each other alone.

However, ever since his old best friend moved in at his place, he changed completely. He spends way more time w him over at his place now. Even when he came home with me, he’d always talk about his best friend, Eli that, Eli this. It hurt me a lot.

Before he’d do anything to come home to sleep with me at night. Regardless I had a late shift at my restaurant. Now all he wanted is space and time away from me.

I fell in love with the needy him. I had someone who loved me to be there for me all the time. I was addicted to his presence.

Now I see how much he doesn’t even bother trying to see me, it hurt me a lot. Suddenly, all he talked about is how he’s so needy and wanted to focus on his career.

Subconsciously I am hurt a lot and I just want to break up with him. But emotionally, it’s like I got this unbreakable bond with this guy. It’s like my soul is forever tied to his.

It’s like he turned me into this needy girl and out of the blue he just abandoned me. I feel so clingy and desperate. Please help me.

Thank you so much!
Best Maria

[Jenny]

He wanted a companion and didnt hve one in the beginning so he would spend all his time with you to the point where u broke ur boundaries and let him in now that he has a best friend, he has got company and maybe eli might have pointed out that he is being too needy and all with you or maybe he is inspired by eli or something else to give attention to career and stop being needy! Initially partners do tend to be needy but then after a while it gets comfortable and then they enjoy their own space.

Don’t worry let him have his space and do something for urself, acquire some skills wtc during ur time away from him.I know its tough goijg through same, just start loving urself and support his decision to get back on track with his career and talk to him about it.
You guys are strong and no petty distnace can separate you so support him instead of thinking he is going away take this space for falling in love with urself again!
This will pass! I’m no expert but this is my advice for u and i hope u get through this, take care

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