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February 11, 2019 at 9:57 am #18120
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So my ex and I have been together officially for 6 months but had seen seeing each other in total for 10 months. I had ended it him one time before over something valid but forgivable. At that time he begged and pleaded to get back with me for weeks until I accepted him back. From that time until the recent break up (3 months), I had suggested breaks for minor reasons due to immaturity as this was my first relationship. I always had the fear of being cheated on or him to do something bad to me that I would always be paranoid or make accusations without evidence. Paranoid thoughts would stem from not hearing from him all day or him taking long to reply a message. However I have matured greatly since then. Anyway, for the recent break up, I ended it on the basis of we had plans to see each other one night then when it came to the time, he told me he had an argument with his bestfriend so he’s had to go 2hrs away to go and sort it, after only just spending the week away with his bestfriend to celebrate his birthday (a week before mine). I was hurt by this as this was during my birthday week, despite him splashing out on my actual birthday day, treating me like a princess, I wanted to see him almost everyday of my week as that’s what he did with his bestfriend. So I sent a long messaging saying it’s time to move on as I’m tired of his behaviour. I can admit that I did do it to get a reaction from him again. However this time he was not begging or pleading me back. He just disappeared. His response to the breakup was that he knows I’ve always wanted to end it and that I always jump to a break up over little issues. So 2 weeks go by and I contact him on Christmas Day and after new years and we have nice long discussions about anything but ignoring the break up. After a month, I met up with him 2 day’s ago to apologise for everything and letting him know I thought he wanted me to end it with the way he did things he knew I hated (such as last minute cancellations without warning). He said he never had any thoughts or intentions of ending it with me and does not like to make me angry on purpose. I asked if he still loved me and he said he still does and thinks he will always be in love with me now and for many years. He said he never had any problems with me in our relationship so he thinks with time it should get better. So I asked if he wants to get back together and he said he can’t jump back into a relationship after what he’s been through. He said throughout the month he has gotten used to moving on from me and so has been thinking about me less and such. So I said he doesn’t want to get back with me. Then he said that’s not what he said and that I should not get him wrong. He said we should take it slow and be ourselves then with time, the more we see each other that I should go back to normal.
He spent the night however he did not want to have sex or be as normally intimate as we usually would as he did not want to rush anything and thinks it would
be more intense later. We just had a lot of passionate hugging and kissing.
He just finished his masters the day we met up, and is going away for a week to celebrate with his friends and I don’t know when he will be back.
So right now I do not know what to do. If I should continue to be persistent in contacting him regularly, or to give him space to miss me.