I havent heard from my boyfriend in 5 days

[Denise]

Hi Luke, first off al thank you for your videos and this option for asking advice.

Okay so i am in a relationship about two years but at this point i don’t know if we still are. We kinda broke up two weeks ago and there was still love and care and we had text contact after a week we got together to talk but mainly exchange his stuff to him, he missed me he said he lost his feeling off being a man and i know we had intimacy problems so i understand that. He told me he was looking to other woman in that week and tried to flirt but he was missing me and couldnt get me out of his head. He went home that evening and we had nice text messages, but i got inside my mind thinking he was on a test period finding out if he could be open for woman and made me insecure. He asked me the day after to do something nice together go out. And i wanted to tell him this when i saw him but got the temptation to say this over whatsapp and shared my feelings about my insecurity and also that day this happend, i shared on whatsapp how handsome i think he is and that he looked good when he sended me a photo, and his response was i need to go poop. I thought that was so unapropiate. He explained that it wasnt tacteful and it was because he was uncomfortable by my compliments. The whole conversation went on with emotions, i thought he doesnt like me anymore if he says something unapropiate, i mean he could also say nothing or say anything else. I felt rejection with that. So before we would meet a started my feelings about this and told him that i dont feel good to have a relationship title again this fast when it goes like this and that we could start over take it slow and he was against it because to be distant again and starting over when we shared everything meant in his eyes that we had never something. So on the day we would do something together he texted me with goodmorning and i replyed with good morning and i was hoping he would be a man and man up and took the last night conversation as okay i need to show her i am man for her. Instead he said that he was feeling down and wanted to do something else with his time. I got frustrated and the whole drama began, in the afternoon we came to the point where we both still wanted to do something together. He texted i still wanted to do something and i replyed with we can? And he said do you want that? And i said yes i would love to meet up. And he said okay its going to be later about in a hour and i said thats perfect and he said ok👍. When i saw the short ok with thumbs up i got a cold vibe and tense and also all the drama drained me and we allready havent saw each other in a week before so i thought maybe it isnt a good idea to push this right now just for the sake of that we want this but when the vibe is off. So i shared my doubts and said maybe another is better because im tired and maybe we are in a different vibe then. He said you are not sure so i dont know maybe its not good to do then. I went for a shower and 13 minutes later i said that was at 15:34 i told him : can we meet at 16:15? I had an shower and maybe i get some energy when i make myself ready. He was at that same time online and he replayed at 16:08 with okay i will drive in a few moments to you. I was pissed that he was online and replyed last minute. So yes the drama started again for hours. And it ended with that him saying he didnt want to text imidiately because i was unsure, so he wanted to think also and that it hurts him if we are like this and everytime he has a feeling we find each other it goes wrong and that he is sorry about that, i went cold and replyed only with “i understand”. That was 5 days ago. We haven’t had contact after that. Now i am in a dilemma, i don’t want to contact him because i have a feeling if i do that i will aprove his behavior for texting last minute intentional and also two days ago i had an important day with school and he new about that and he didnt text me to ask about that, so also a reason why i dont want to text him first. At the other hand my reaction was cold and i understand he could feel insecure feeling not like a man and needs my validation. From our first sort off break up a week and a half ago went we had contact it i initiated contact 4 times and he also 4 times. What is your advice on this?

With kind regards,

Denise

[Gracie]

Let him go. If a man wants you he will chase you down with no excuses. He is seeking attention from somewhere else and does not want to hurt your feelings.

[Author]

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