Home › Forums › Online Dating › Love is blind right?! Knowing the difference between instincts or overthinking
This topic contains 1 reply, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Nelly 3 years, 1 month ago.
April 17, 2020 at 8:25 pm #24888
Thank you for taking ur time to read this x
So l met my boyfriend in October 2018 just as l was staring uni. He was so understanding and as always attentive and responsive to my texts and calls on time . But something inside me told be something wasn’t right and honestly l ignored this telling my self l was overthinking and how could l doubt him after all he has always been there. The more l thought about him the more l had questions, he knew everything about me but I only knew so little. I tried to engage in open conversation and discussions with him but his answer as always brief and vague. I have never been to his place, only spends nights or few hours at my place and have not met his friends. From what l have learnt these are all red flags but he says he loves me and his so kind and caring. I thought the reasons he doesn’t stay long was for me to focus on my studies (which have and will always be my priority) but l am starting to doubt this or am l just over thinking. Unlike me, l decided to find out more about him using social media only to find out that he had a baby in April 2019 with his ‘ex’ which he would have know as their friendships goes way back. At first he denied it but after admitted. I still haven’t made sense of it why l had to find out myself almost a year later. His mum recently visited from aboard and we went even introduced or didn’t even meet. Part of me wonders if l am a sport fish, keeper or something, if he never really broke up with his ‘ex’ before meeting me (l really don’t like guy games). With Clovid-19 can’t really revisit this discussion again over phone or message right + his likely to give me vague answers again?
He says is cares and loves me.
Is it appropriate to contact his suppose ‘ex’ for clarification? Should l give him a test to prove his love and loyalty? Is he worth it? Should l let him go?
I really wonder is what l am feeling jealous, overthinking or my instincts.April 20, 2020 at 11:27 am #24890
I think he Cares about you but for sure he has another woman in his life. At this point you just have to decide whether you want to stay with him knowing that he has another woman or you wanna let him go.Are you OK with letting him go that is the biggest question.If I were you I would politely ask his ex if they’re still together.
If you want him to be serious with only you. You would have to let him go and be firm about it.This would give him a chance to know if he really wants be with you or without you.And if he comes back you have to make sure that he is transparent with you completely.
If you’re not ready to lose him then you’re going to have Keep dating him at his terms.
P.s If you do decide to let him go you have to start dating other people even if it’s casual so he can really really miss you and be jealous
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