My girlfriend doesn't wanna kiss me

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  • #21077 Reply

    George Coapsi

    Hello,

    I’ve been together with this girl for around 1 month now and she’s sometimes acting distant like she doesn’t care at all about me but calls me to go to her place and hang out and sleep there.

    Also, she doesn’t want to kiss me. Sometimes I try to kiss her and she doesn’t want to, she just turns her head but hugs me and scratches my head and back. I’ve tried to talk to her about it and she said she doesn’t feel like kissing so she won’t do it, also we can’t even have an intimate moment because if we kiss it’s just a small kiss, not even a French one.

    When she’s drunk she comes and kisses me and gives me affection but when she’s sober she’s acting distant and if I act a little indifferent she starts asking me what’s wrong.

    What should I do? I hate being in this situation where I feel like I’m not her priority (as she said that her number one priority is her friends) and that she doesn’t even like me that much. Also, she acts jealous from time to time.

    Thanks a lot for your help!

    #21078 Reply

    Luke
    Keymaster

    Hi George,

    Being that your physical and emotional needs are not being met in this relationship, you may have a girlfriend in name only.

    She has consistently shown that she doesn’t want to kiss you in the way that you want to be kissed nor give you the kind of affection that you desire.

    She has even told you that she doesn’t like you that much and that her number one priority are her friends.

    You may have gotten into a relationship with a girl who doesn’t really have any interest in being in a true relationship.

    She wants somebody to be there when she is alone.

    This is why she calls you over to her place to hang out and sleep over.

    However, she is not willing to give of herself emotionally and show true affection.

    This may be because she is not at a place emotionally where she’s willing to make herself that vulnerable or she may still be dealing with the emotional repercussions of a relatively recent breakup with an ex or she may even be a narcissist who only cares about her own self-importance when it comes to romantic relationships.

    Whatever the reason may be, the fact that she’s not showing you the kind of physical and emotional intimacy that you require is a major problem.

    She’s getting what she needs out of you in having a warm body laying next to her at night or someone to hang out with when she is alone, but you’re not getting what you need out of her.

    This means that there is an unhealthy imbalance in the dynamics of this relationship.

    Being that you have allowed her to get away with this kind of behavior, she may not truly understand just how much this affects you.

    You should have a real conversation with her and let her know exactly what it is that you’re experiencing and how you’re feeling.

    If she is unwilling to understand and consequently begin the process of making positive changes, it will not be a good idea to continue being in a relationship with her.



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