What should I do?

[Emma]

Hi Luke,
I’m a senior in high school and there is this guy I’ve liked for a while now. Last school year we made a lot of eye contact but I would always look away because I’d get nervous. Even after summer we kept making eye contact all the time. About a month ago we had this senior trip to Paris for 5 days. When we were there I talked to him for the first time ever. Anytime we’d talk we would laugh. According to my friend he kept looking at me secretly but I’m not sure about that. There were a few times that I didn’t notice he was around and when I did he would be looking at me. While we were there he dropped his phone in the Seine when we were on a boat ride by accident. Everyone knew about it. After the trip ended it was fall break and I decided to message him on messenger about how his phone situation was. We started messaging for a few days and he kept the conversation going by asking questions. However, he would always take super long to reply. We would have a conversation and then he’s suddenly disappear. He wouldn’t text back until after a few hours or even a day even though I saw he was active throughout the day. When school started again i smiled at him when he walked past me and he winked at me. This was three weeks ago. He sometimes takes the bus and it’s the same bus I take. This week, on Tuesday after school he was on my bus again and I walked to the back where I usually stand because the bus is so crowded. He and his twin brother were standing by the door and on the other side there was a girl sitting alone. Since the seat way empty I asked her if i could sit there. She said her friend would be coming and right at her moment her friend came and sat down. I then heard someone say ‘auch’ so I looked at the guy I’m interested it. He was the one who said it and he was smiling at me me. We laughed about it and I just said it was worth trying. The rest of the bus ride I just talked to my best friend, and I didn’t talk to him anymore. According to my friend, when I got of the bus his twin brother was grinning at him. Then yesterday when I left my locker I walked past him. We made eye contact again so I smiled at him and he winked again. He used the wink emoji in messenger a few times as well. I don’t know if it means something or if he’s just someone who winks a lot in general. After school he was on my bus again but we still didn’t talk even though he was standing about 1,5 meters away from me. His brother was with him though and my best friend was with me as usual.

I honestly don’t know what to do. I really like this guy and we hit it off in Paris and over messenger. I’m not sure if me likes me or not. And if he does why doesn’t he initiate conversation? Is he just shy or not interested? I want things to progress but I don’t want to make another move online. I’m also too shy to start talking to him in person since he’s almost always with his friends or brother. Please tell me what I should do.

[LukeKeymaster]

Hi Emma,

The constant eye contact between the both of you would suggest that there is some mutual attraction.

However, that attraction isn’t strong enough for him to feel compelled to make a move on you or initiate conversation.

He isn’t all that intrigued by you.

The length of time it would take him to respond to your messages on messenger also indicates this.

Sometimes he would take hours or even a day.

He has most likely come to a point where he feels that, though he may find you to be attractive, he isn’t intrigued enough by you to want to take the risk on pursuing you in a romantic capacity.

He isn’t necessarily shy nor uninterested.

He seems like a relatively social guy.

After all, he does have friends and he also didn’t hesitate to make a joke out of the situation where you were unable to get that empty seat on the bus due to the friend of a passenger taking it.

If you are too shy to start talking to him in person because he is always with his friends or brother, try to find out about what other extracurricular activities he is involved in at school.

There is a chance that he could be a part of some school club, organization or event.

If he is, this would be your opportunity to join that group.

It will give you the best chance at getting to interact with him more and even getting him to talk to you on more of a one on one basis without his friends or brother getting in the way.

[Author]

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