Online dating in and of itself doesn’t lower your self-esteem.
Human beings are emotional creatures.
When we are attracted to someone, our emotions get in the way.
We want that person to be attracted to us too.
Online dating sites are filled with people in search of a match.
People don’t meet anywhere near the number of dating prospects in real life as they would meet on an online dating site.
This exposes us to a higher amount of rejection.
Online dating is a visual medium.
There isn’t the benefit of friendship or prior knowledge of a romantic prospect.
People judge you on what you present in your dating profile.
To this end, it makes sense that people go through a larger amount of rejection on dating apps than in real life.
Rejection has nothing to do with online dating in and of itself.
The average person who approaches a man or woman they are attracted to in a club or bar doesn’t want to be rejected.
When that happens, many absorb it personally, allowing their self-esteem to get knocked down a number of pegs.
We have the same emotional reaction when we get rejected on online dating sites.
Online dating amplifies the experience, being that we are exposed to a larger number of dating prospects.
Rejection is rejection, and we go through it in real life as we do in online dating.
It’s convenient to direct the blame at online dating, but online dating isn’t the reason why your self-esteem is lowered whenever you are rejected or nothing comes of a good conversation with a dating prospect.
Your self-esteem is from within you.
When you attach your self-worth to what people think about you or how attracted they are to you, you make yourself vulnerable to lowered self-esteem.
Technically, no one determines how you react emotionally to anything, whether it be pleasant or unpleasant.
You determine how you react emotionally.
As human beings we look for a scapegoat when we have negative feelings.
In your case, you blame online dating for your lowered self-esteem.
Directing the blame at it relieves the responsibility you have for managing your own emotions.
You are responsible for your own emotions.
No one has the power to force a reaction out of you, whether good or bad.
Only you do.
Online dating doesn’t lower self-esteem.
It’s a marketplace where people judge you on your immediate physical appeal and that has more to do with humanity itself and how we prefer to date those we are attracted to, than anything else.
Online dating amplifies human behavior.
The judgment seems harsher online because it is a visual medium.
Although real life mimics online dating in that most people date those they are attracted to, there are exceptions.
For instance, a friendship between two people who weren’t attracted to each other upon entering the friendship, could blossom into a romance.
These exceptions don’t exist in online dating.
As a visual medium, people have nothing but your appearance to judge you by.
To get what you want out of online dating, you have to develop a thicker skin and stop taking rejection this personally.
Trust that the right match for you is imminent, as long as you stick with it.