Online Dating: How Many Dates Before Going Over To His Place?

Online Dating: How Many Dates Before Going Over To His Place?

Think about why you signed up on a dating site.

Are you looking for a hookup or a serious relationship?

Be confident about what you are looking for.

This knowledge gives you clarity from the moment you sign up on a dating site to the moment you meet someone on a date.

When the objective is to hook up, the first date already establishes whether there is an attraction.

Going on numerous dates doesn’t get you any further in determining whether you are attracted to the person.

You already establish that with the first date.

So, should you go on further dates with the person before going over to his place, when you have already established physical attraction on the first date?

Even though the intent is to hook up and nothing more, you still need to practice common sense safety measures.

Going over to his place isn’t the same thing as meeting him at a public bar on a date.

Going on additional dates with him, at least three, gives you a better idea on whether he is someone you can trust with your personal safety.

Couple this with asking him for some personal information, such as his last name, to see whether he has a criminal record.

True, lots of people get caught up in primal passion when they meet on that first date and bypass any safety measures in going over to his place to cap the night.

Be smarter than this.

If the goal is to hook up, do it responsibly.

I get it.

You might fall into the group of people who doesn’t want to take this much time to vet a guy that you are only looking to hook up with.

In the event you don’t want to do all this vetting and just want to get busy fast, pick a neutral place to hook up, as opposed to going over to his place.

A well-reputed hotel for instance.

There are cameras everywhere and personnel.

This gives you better protection, mitigating the risk of going over to his place.

On the flip side, signing up on a dating site intent on meeting someone for a serious long-term relationship is a different story.

Even when people have this intent, many still make the mistake of going out on one date with the guy and going over to his place on the second date.

This inevitably leads to having sex too soon or setting that expectation too soon.

A guy who wants a long-term serious relationship doesn’t have sex at the forefront of his mind.

He takes a wide variety of factors into account.

Does she have good morals?

Do we share common goals?

Is she trustworthy?

When a guy is intent on a long-term relationship, the prospect of going over to his place is never a priority.

There is nothing in the dating playbook that states that a visit to his place is a must in the early stages of dating.

It isn’t.

Instead of ruminating on how many dates you should go on before going over to his place, pay attention to simply going out with him and having a good time.

This means that you don’t put a timetable on it.

Going over to his place should happen organically.

Whether that takes three dates, four dates, six dates, etc., don’t get hung up on it.

Guys who lie about wanting a serious relationship but are really looking for a hookup, rarely last beyond two dates, when they haven’t been successful in getting a girl to go back to their place.

To be on the safe side, any guy who suggests going over to his place within the first two dates is a guy to filter out.