This had you weirded out.
You have had one or two conversations with this guy so far, after matching with him on Bumble, and yet, out of nowhere, you receive a message from him on FB (Facebook).
The message came off as though he didn’t think it strange that he was messaging a woman he had recently matched with on Bumble completely out of the blue.
A guy that does this has done this before.
Many people get the false impression that dating apps are anonymous, which then creates a false sense of security.
A dating profile isn’t anonymous.
You can be easily found on social media with simply a photo that you are using on your dating profile.
So, don’t deceive yourself into thinking that a dating profile affords you a degree of anonymity that isn’t present in other parts of the internet.
It wasn’t hard for this guy to find you on social media.
He didn’t need your last name.
He didn’t need much.
Be aware that just about any guy can find your social media information by gleaning bits of information from your dating profile or solely with your photos.
That being said, this guy has done this before.
He sent that FB message because he knows that getting to communicate with you outside the dating app gives him an upper hand.
Essentially, he takes the conversation away from the dating app so as to get a greater amount of your attention.
A woman receives a considerable amount of matches on dating apps from men who are competing for you attention and he knows this.
In sending you an FB message, he is setting himself apart from those men in the hopes of sequestering as much of your attention as possible.
You are rightfully weirded out by what he has just done and probably questioning whether it is wise to keep talking to this guy.
He chose to send you an FB message without an invitation from you.
That shows that he is a guy who doesn’t care about boundaries.
This is an instant red flag.
A guy who is this quick to overstep a boundary will overstep other boundaries that you have.
This is a sign that he wouldn’t be a good candidate for a relationship.
There are boundaries that don’t need to be mentioned.
They are simply recognized.
Choosing to communicate with you on a social media platform without your permission is a violation of an unspoken boundary.
This behavior stems from a degree of desperation that was instigated by a series of disappointing outcomes on Bumble.
He has had trouble in keeping the attention of women he matches with on dating apps.
He has one or two conversations with them and they are no longer responding.
They disappear on him.
To keep himself from going through this over and over again, he developed a strategy.
As soon as he matches with a woman on Bumble and has a conversation with her, he intends to find her social media and message her.
This way, he reduces the risk of her getting bored with him too soon and turning her attention to the other men vying for her on Bumble.
Again, you are not the only woman he has been this brazen in messaging on her social media.