Emotional maturity is a big topic of discussion in the world of dating and relationships.
A discipline that has a man in lockstep with his emotions, as he acknowledges, understands, controls and grows as an emotionally mature human being.
It requires a man who isn’t afraid of his feelings.
Men are raised to keep their feelings at bay, having been taught that acknowledging them and expressing them makes him look weak.
A man who gets past this indoctrination or mindset, is a man who has the courage to do what it takes to elevate himself to emotional maturity.
This is what she seeks.
Is it a red flag?
A woman who feels the need to include this in her dating profile has had a history of dating men who aren’t emotionally mature.
It has happened so often that she feels like she must make a statement and scream it to the rooftops that she wants a man who is emotionally mature.
She has had previous relationships with men who weren’t at one with their emotions.
Whether he was suppressing them or ignoring them, he wasn’t being emotionally mature.
This left her with several moments of frustration as she tried to figure him out.
It made her relationship with him a chore and miserable.
A man she couldn’t read.
A man who was passive-aggressive with his emotions.
This left her having to do a whole lot of mental gymnastics trying to figure out why he was upset or why he was suddenly aloof.
All of this is exhausting in a relationship.
She doesn’t want to go through this with someone new she meets on a dating app.
This is what has led her to stating that she wants an emotionally mature man.
Have these bad relationships with men who weren’t emotionally mature left her emotionally damaged?
This is where it gets worrisome.
Just how much has she been negatively affected by these past relationships?
This comes to light when you come into her orbit on a dating app, start communicating, and she immediately tests your level of emotional maturity.
This is a red flag.
She barely knows you and all of a sudden she is antagonizing you or critiquing you.
It is done with a degree of subtlety, but this doesn’t change the fact that she is testing you this early to see whether you have emotional maturity.
This is a woman who is emotionally damaged and you must avoid.
You don’t even have to get as far as talking to her to know whether she is emotionally damaged.
Sometimes, her dating profile gives it away.
When she spends a good amount of it stating what she doesn’t want in a match, she is emotionally damaged.
Unfortunately, her past relationships where she endured emotionally immature partners has left her more concerned with protecting herself from said men than anything else.
This has an effect of making her see every man as emotionally immature, including any man who swipes right on her dating profile.
This is where you pull out the red flag and quickly move on to the next dating profile.