Online Dating: She Doesn’t Want To Commit To A 2nd Date?

Online Dating: She Doesn't Want To Commit To A 2nd Date?

That 1st date was great, as far as you were concerned.

Conversation was as natural as it felt on the dating app you met her on, save for a few awkward silences.

There was laughter and giggling.

It lasted a good few hours.

Everything went well and you were looking forward to a 2nd date.

Unfortunately, when you texted her after the 1st date, she responded with a bunch of word vomit that left you disappointed about your 2nd date prospects with her.

Phrases like, “I am not sure if I should commit to a 2nd date,” “I am speaking to other guys on the dating app too,” and, “I don’t really know how to approach this,” are just a few that you read and reread in an attempt to figure out what she was telling you.

Being that she is a woman, you recognize that she receives a lot of matches on a dating app.

Is that a good enough of an excuse though?

You don’t think that speaking to other guys on a dating app is a good enough excuse to not be sure about whether she wants to commit to a 2nd date or not.

She should know who she wants to keep going out on dates with.

It’s not like you are having a hard time figuring out who you want to date. Granted, you don’t have anywhere near as many matches and she does.

Nevertheless, you have chatted with a few other girls on the dating app, and so far, this is the girl you have established the strongest connection to.

Amid all the word vomit she sent you, there is a part of you that is hoping she wants to go on a 2nd date.

She said she wasn’t sure if she should commit to a 2nd date, but she didn’t directly tell you that she wouldn’t go to a 2nd date with you.

This is you grasping at straws.

You know that, but you really like this girl.

After such a good few weeks talking to her on a dating app prior to meeting up on a 1st date, there was a significant amount of rapport established.

There were several shared interests, and a connection you hadn’t felt with anyone else.

There was such promise between you and letting go of her now leaves a bad taste in your mouth, as though the last few weeks of building rapport on a dating app was wasted.

It is always a bummer when a girl tells you that she isn’t sure if she should commit to a 2nd date, especially when you thought the 1st date went well.

But the reality is what it is.

Although you thought the 2nd date went well, she didn’t feel likewise.

You were seeing what you wanted to see.

Every time she uttered a laugh, you instantly interpreted that as a sign that she was enjoying her date with you.

Whenever she gave you a brief compliment, you took that as a sign that she was attracted to you.

She had spent some time chatting with you on a dating app and wasn’t going to behave rudely in not laughing along with you or giving you a compliment here and there.

She believed she owed you that much.

None of this means that she was having romantic chemistry with you.

Unfortunately, you are too stuck on how good of a rapport you built with her on a dating app.

The rapport got you so hyped up about her, it influenced how you experienced the 1st date.

Basically, you were on one date, and she was on another.

You were so hopeful that the date would go well, you saw what you wanted to see, and missed several of her body language cues that was showing she wasn’t connecting with you romantically.

When she maintains a physical distance with you throughout the date, she is using her body language to show she isn’t connecting with you romantically.

Ditto for when she doesn’t maintain extended periods of eye contact.

Any of this sound familiar?

A woman who genuinely wants to see a guy again makes it apparent in no uncertain terms in what she says and does.

When there is ambiguity, she is indicating that she has no interest in seeing him again.

It’s time to let her go.