It’s strange when this happens.
There is a match.
The guy messages you, and without much of an introduction, he asks to meet.
You have had this happen to you several times on dating apps and it’s puzzling.
It baffles you that a guy would immediately ask to meet without establishing whether there is chemistry through back and forth conversation.
It isn’t lost to you that you are on a dating app to meet someone, but having conversation beforehand with a match to determine whether there is chemistry isn’t unreasonable.
You are right.
Having conversation beforehand matters, but for a number of guys, establishing whether there is chemistry with you through having conversation on a dating app isn’t tremendously important.
He doesn’t want to risk having a conversation with you that fizzles out.
Guys on dating apps complain about this phenomenon on dating apps.
This is a guy who has started a conversation with a match in the past that fizzled out over time.
She wasn’t replying to his messages as quickly as she once was and her responses were shorter.
She wasn’t asking him questions, which left it to him to keep a conversation going, and in addition, come up with topics to chat about.
He was initiating the conversations and keeping those conversations going.
That was a ton of work.
But his efforts were in vain as she got lazier and lazier with her responses.
Soon, he was messaging her and she wasn’t bothering to reply at all.
The conversation completely fizzled out before he had a chance to ask her out.
There are guys who have this experience over and over again with girls they match with on dating apps.
A number of them become exasperated and change tactics.
He isn’t going to bother trying to get into an extended conversation with a new match.
The moment he gets a match, he intends to ask her to meet in his first message to her.
That is what this guy has done with you.
Although you think it strange that he immediately asked to meet, he doesn’t.
As far as he is concerned, he is doing what he has to do.
He doesn’t want to put in the time and energy into having an extended conversation with you, only to have the conversation fizzle out before he has had a chance to ask you out.
In his logic, you can get to know each other over a drink tonight.
People sign up on dating apps to meet someone to date.
That is the purpose, although there are some who have ulterior motives for doing it.
Regardless, a dating app isn’t social media, where people gather to have frivolous conversations until they die out.
The goal of online dating is to meet someone to date.
In asking to meet immediately, he is accelerating the process.
He is fully aware there is a risk in asking to meet this fast, but he has rationalized that it is worth it.
Better to ask to meet immediately and get turned down by the girl, than waste weeks of conversation that fizzles out.